cycle of thoughts

My writing is an expression of pure inner thought/
some of it experience but of it not / relevant to the life I/ live out fantasies from the deep, dark, depths of hidden/ thoughts of pleasure some times consume my mind/ and passion finds a way to intertwine/ with the pain that some how seems to be confined/ to the personal being that of which/ I am defined as an emotional creature trying to survive/
in a world of uncertainty/ that worries me to find where the future leads from the past/ behind the cold stares and hard exterior shell/ is a softy yearning for the one whom to tell the deepest darkest secrets/
while life prevails so does the shell and so does the feeling of a living hell/ I don't understand half of what I write/ cause what I write is a fight of the inner/ selfishness prevails as I try to heal/ from the past/
behind enemy lines is where my mind resides and feels confined because society around me is too blind/ to be able to consume and digest the thoughts/ I seem to find more of a reason to try and be just like you/
cause you seem to have the glue/ that holds you captive to the lines/ society has drawn out for/ you are nothing like the one my mother warned me about/ and it goes without a doubt to say/ I would never what to live out my life this way/
welded to the norms through a constricted identity/ and tragically this is all I see/ everyone trying to fit in like one entity/ saying that you're doing you/ but I see you as you follow the leader/ even though there's no leader to follow/ behind one another like fools with no education surpassing high school/ friends ask why don't I tweet/ and I reply cause I would be just like you/ following a bunch of people that have no clue/ left behind by blues plays in the background/
as I try to understand how I've become wound in the false security/ of  this great society/ that adds to my anxiety of why me/
stuck in a cycle of repetitive immorality that has no point at which to cease/ I step back, digress and breath/ as I watch everything around me cycle and increase with an intensity times three/
the only expression apparent to me is that of disbelief/ in the fact that no one seems to see/
the bigger problem contained within the basic norms of society/ that being a lack of integrity, morality, and individuality

Mela J`