through my pen

My eyes swell with water, but i fight it back in
i refuse to let a tear fall cause I cry through my pen
Heart hurts to beat cause of the pain thats with in
but i refuse to let a tear fall cause I cry through my pen
For many years my pen has been my best friend
when no one would listen or when i needed a hand
A confidant I could count on through thick and thin
that help ease the pain and heartache better than man
It never judged or belittled me or my thoughts
it has always been there no matter what time i call
Over the years we've been through  it all
phases in life both big and small
I had a good day today
so I smiled through pen
Shared a few jokes yesterday
so I laughed through it
Last week he pissed me off
so yeah i vented with my pen
But as of right now Im an emotional wreck
and what i need to do most is to cry through my pen
I refuse to let water steam from these eyes
cause its not worth the tears, but I cant seem to hide
the hurt and anguish deep down inside
Something about hurt and pain doesnt fade away
it only adds up, like a volcano ready to erupt
Until one day when I blow up
and it all pours out
And everything comes boiling over in a rush
so strong it could crush the very ground we stand on
So I reach for my pen
as though it were the shoulder of my best friend
And I release a cry so sweet and cleansing to the soul
that when its all said and done the pain has turned cold
I no longer feel a rage of fire and animosity
and things no longer appear to me as a monstrosity
I didnt shead a tear
and let disappointments get the best of me
I just picked up my pen and cried through its ink
to release the stress and disappointment that once had a hold on me.
  -J.Shaw

untitled release

frustration, aggrevation, annoyance, irritation
one in the same, but different as we name them
feelings run rampant and cluster together
overpowered by the upsets that most people weather
control it, confine it, keep it to yourself (keep it together)
cause in present day America your feelings are cared for by only you and no one else
yeah it bothers you, upsets you, and kills your mood
but every mans for themselves, according to the rules
but my presidnet is black, theres a new man in office
he said lets make a change and this is where im gonna start it
so lets cut the games and the crap, kill the imaginary rules cause when following them in the end we all lose
we fail to realize there are things more important that ourselves
and with a mind frame like that we are destined(certaint) to fail
what good can we bring with self obsessed, egotisical, and ignorant morals,
especially if thats what we're teaching to the young ones below us?
small ears and eyes intake and digest everything, even when you think theres no harm to be seen
Barry White( in a different context) once said practice what you preach. no more needs to be said
set the example for the ones that are to follow
instilling  compassion, empathy and friendship leaves hope for tomorrow
and maybe one day the rules will read every man help another, and we'll learn to treat each other like sistes and brothers.